Grief

“Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane; and he said to his disciples, ‘Sit here while I go over there and pray.’ He took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be grieved and agitated. Then he said to them, ‘I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay awake with me.’ And going a little farther, he threw himself on the ground and prayed, ‘My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I want but what you want.’” - Matthew 26:36-39, NRSV, emphasis added

Grief. It strikes us in the heart. It drives its painful hands deep into our souls. Grief is unavoidable in this life. It is a sign of the loss of someone or something we deeply care about, and it has touched the lives of all of us. No two people grieve the same way. Sometimes the depths of grief can be so deep, it feels like we are drowning. Even the strongest swimmers struggle to tread water. Grief can be all consuming.

And yet, Jesus knew what it was like to grieve.

After the celebration of the Last Supper on the night before his crucifixion, Jesus went with his disciples to the garden of Gethsemane. Jesus wanted support from his disciples as he entered into the garden to pray, just like we need support from those we love. Jesus asked them to “. . . ‘remain here, and stay awake with me’” as he went to speak with his Father in prayer (Matthew 26:38). However, the disciples struggled to stay awake and still fell asleep!

In the garden of Gethsemane, Jesus approached God the Father in prayer and “threw himself on the ground” in agony (26:39). The Savior of the world agonized what was to come: his suffering and death on the cross.

When he found his disciples asleep, “. . . he said to Peter, ‘So, could you not stay awake with me for one hour? Stay awake and pray that you may not come into the time of trial; the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak’” (26:40-41, emphasis added). Jesus experienced grief in this scene. Jesus wanted the support of his friends as he grieved what was to come the following day. In this moment, Jesus reminds us that our bodies are weak, and we will fail (26:41).

Jesus suffered in the garden and ultimately on the cross for all of us. Jesus felt the weight of what was to come. He grieved the sins of humanity: of those who turned away from him and of those who would turn away in the future. Jesus had knowledge of the loss of life that would take place the following day. His own life. While we cannot anticipate what is to come, we sometimes can begin to grieve something that we know is coming: like the loss of a family member. In the midst of their sickness, we know that their death is coming, and we begin to grieve. This is a bit similar to what Jesus went through in the garden. It is not anywhere near the magnitude that Jesus suffered. However, our anticipation of the death of someone we love is a small glimpse into the “cup” that Jesus was to drink from on his crucifixion day (Matthew 26:39).

Jesus also grieved over the death of another.

Jesus also grieved the death of Lazarus as depicted in the gospel of John. Mary, the sister of Lazarus, came to Jesus and wept before him (John 11:32-33). The gospel indicates that, “when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her also weeping, he was greatly disturbed in spirit and deeply moved” (11:33). After asking Mary where Lazarus was laid to rest after his death, “Jesus began to weep” (11:35, emphasis added). The people who witnessed this acknowledged this display by saying, “See how he loved him!” (11:36). Jesus experienced the sadness of losing a friend and experienced great empathy for Mary as she grieved the loss of her brother. (Read the rest of the story in John 11:38-44 where Jesus raises Lazarus from the dead!)

When I am in the depths of my grief, I am reminded that Jesus understands what I am going through, because He himself experienced it too. He knows every little thing I am feeling.

Jesus is worthy of running to for help. He understands us completely. In the depths of my grief, Jesus is there with me. I am not drowning, even if it feels like it. Jesus is in the waters of grief with me, swimming alongside me, supporting me as I navigate my way to the shore. And when I make it to the shore, He is there to to pull me out of the water to dry land.

I am grateful there is a Savior who would do this for me. I would say I am eternally in His debt, but He paid my debt for me! Alleluia!

In Christ,

Lauren

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All scripture quotations are from the New Revised Standard Version (NRSV) of the Bible

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